IT MAY not be an expression routinely bandied around the corridors of power, but Culture, Media and Sport Secretary Jeremy Hunt would do well to ponder the proverb 'all frills and no knickers'.

One suspects public school educated Mr Hunt, management consultant, MP for five minutes and spare-time Brazilian lambada dancer has given it considerably less thought than the Londoners wondering from whence their Olympic legacy will emerge. Or indeed if.

Mr Hunt sees no harm in doubling the bill for the opening and closing ceremonies to £80m, or that instead of 10,000 security guards protecting the Games we suddenly need 23,000. Kerching! That's another £271m down the Swanee.

It was no surprise that, with our Olympic 'dream' emanating from the fantasy world bubble surrounding up-and-coming billionaire T. Blair, the cost rapidly ballooned from £2.4bn to £9.3bn. But how soon before the contingency fund, that seemingly bottomless money pit for meeting all those 'surprise' little extras, is revealed as so much Scotch mist?

When you know your neighbour's crippled by debt, paying mega bank charges and supporting his resource-draining wastrel European cousins, you'd think him a right prat if he got a new car, the latest slimline telly and started sending his kids to ballet lessons as a show of self-confidence.

However our Jem shuns an austerity Olympics by not only refusing to make cuts, but vowing to carry on spending to show "Britain is on the front foot". Prat. And who's paying? The population banned from using their own streets for 16 days, the families with more chance of winning a sprint gold medal than getting a ticket, and the tourist haunts whose peak summer trade is seeking non-Olympic fare (and prices) in other lands.

Would any knickerless Olympic nations have begrudged us a pack of candles and Chris Tarrant as MC? Still, the poverty-stricken borough of Newham's got a shiny, new hockey stadium, the London 2012 organisers have already got their New Year honours regardless, and the Tube drivers have trousered their bribes for not going on strike.

Meanwhile, sycophantic Seb Coe assures Dave, aka T. Blair's reincarnation on earth, that London 2012 could be his "Falklands moment".

And, talking of which, the Falkland Islanders should be afraid. Very afraid. Dave's pre-Christmas pledge of eternal support must be taken with the same pinch of salt as his promises on an EU referendum, abolishing the Human Rights Act, increasing the size of the Army and blocking bankers' bonuses.

A happy 2012 to you too.